Warning, the following warnings contain instances of stupid and silly predictions. These two seperate warnings were issued by the HK Silly board sometime today.
"RED FIRE DANGER WARNING
THE FIRE DANGER WARNING IS RED AND THE FIRE RISK IS EXTREME.
DISPATCHED BY HONG KONG OBSERVATORY (SILLY BOARD) AT 06:00 HKT ON 30.12.2007
COLD WEATHER WARNING
Cold Weather Warning
The Cold Weather Warning has been issued by the Hong Kong
Observatory at 4:20 p.m."
So it's going to be a freezing cold fire? Huh? Do I put on some mittens or get some marshmellows? Which one is it!!!!???
"The Hong Kong Observatory is forecasting cold weather in
Hong Kong in the next few days.
The minimum temperatures in the urban areas for tomorrow
will be around 11 degrees. It will be a few degrees lower
in the New Territories.
As Hong Kong is being affected by a cold winter monsoon,
people are advised to put on warm clothes and to avoid
adverse health effects due to the cold weather. You must
also ensure adequate indoor ventilation."
How do you avoid Health "effects"? Can I just avoid Health all together?
"If you must go out, please avoid prolonged exposure to
wintry winds."
Yes, you wouldn't want to get frostbite. Your Starbucks might freeze!
"If you know of elderly persons or persons with chronic
medical conditions staying alone, please call or visit them
occasionally to check if they need any assistance.
Make sure heaters are safe before use, and place them away
from any combustibles. Do not light fires indoors as a
means to keep warm.
Whatever the temperature, please ensure that there is
plenty of fresh air in your room when you are using an
old-type gas water heater.
DISPATCHED BY HONG KONG OBSERVATORY AT 16:21 HKT ON 30.12.2007"
Be careful everyone, don't slip on the ice. And be prepared to run from the massive flames spouting from Kowloon. Funny how there is a fire warning yet they tell people to avoid having indoor fires, but say nothing against having them outside... Bonfire away!
No comments:
Post a Comment